Destination Weekend Weddings have become increasingly more popular. Briefly stated, a Destination Weekend Wedding is a weekend wedding in which the couple and their family or bridal parties take a space at an inn, lodge, bed and breakfast, hotel or resort. Often, they get exclusive use of the space, and, where necessary, the remainder of the guests are housed at other area locations.

The objective of the couple who choose this alternative wedding celebration is to find a venue that will host a variety of activities from Friday afternoon to Sunday afternoon. On Friday, the wedding party checks in, gets settled and relaxes before the weekend events commence. This extra day gives the bride and her wedding party time to “hang out” and to deal with any last minute details. Likewise, it gives the groom the time to check scheduling and logistics with the point person at the venue. The parents, maid of honor and best man have enough time to review at their leisure their check lists of chores and still be left with plenty of time to handle any last minute glitches. Such a wedding is especially lovely for guests who are traveling from far away, giving them ample time to deal with any transportation changes that make their trip longer than anticipated.

The Schedule for the Weekend
Late Friday afternoon, or evening, is when most couples hold their rehearsal dinner on-site. It’s important for the couple to put in extra effort to avoiding hosting a “second wedding.” The rehearsal dinner is best when it is a casual, laid-back party, preferably held in a different space, with different food. It’s time when guests can let down their hair, literally and figuratively, a real foil for the formal wedding reception.

Bridal couples should remember that Saturday morning’s breakfast may be the only food they get to eat all day, so it’s important for them to sit down to a hearty meal. Part of Saturday’s activities may find the bride and her bridesmaids visiting a hair salon, or working with a stylist who comes with her entourage to the destination location. The latter allows the women in the wedding party to get their hair and makeup done in a more private, comfortable setting. Recently, another element has been added to the Destination Wedding, especially if it’s one where guests live spread throughout the state or country. The bride’s attendants can plan a shower for after breakfast, or combine it with a light lunch. If they’re really clever, they can work with the manager and make the event a surprise.

If the couple choose not to see one another prior to the wedding, the venue needs to be large enough for them to stay comfortably apart. Only if the venue does not afford that amount of privacy may it become necessary for the groom to remain at another location.

Guests begin to arrive on Saturday afternoon and may familiarize themselves with the wedding location. A welcome station with very light fare is a wonderful way to greet the guests. In warm weather, fruit, cheese and cold drinks, like lemonade and punch, are appropriate. In the cooler weather, hot apple cider, cocoa, crackers and cheese are a good choice.

Then comes Saturday evening and the long-awaited wedding reception, which presents itself as it would at a non-weekend wedding. The length of the weekend events will vary from location to location, but the philosophy of those who host Destination-Weekend Weddings is to allow everyone attending a feeling of exclusivity, without being rushed to make way for another wedding party. Leisurely is the byword.

Before, during and after the festivities, this type of venue also provides some quiet getaway time for the bride, the groom or both. Their own private bedroom can be there waiting to afford them that opportunity for cool down, alone time or touch-ups.

Sunday morning arrives and everyone can sleep late. Once awake, the bridal party and their guests have a congenial atmosphere in which to get coffee and think about having breakfast. Just when you think it’s all over, along comes Sunday Brunch and a great opportunity to spend quality time, especially with guests who have come from afar. After brunch the official schedule comes to an end and it’s time to pack up and head out.

So You Want a Destination Weekend Wedding…
If you have decided that a Destination Weekend Wedding is what you want, there are information and tips that may help with your planning. If the venue you select is neither near the bride’s home nor her family’s, it may prove valuable to hire a local wedding consultant who can help with arrangements. The time, effort and cost of traveling back and forth to check on and finalize details can be high. A wedding consultant can carry part of that burden. Many hotels and resorts offer a wedding consultant, wedding coordinator or event planner as part of their wedding packages. A local consultant who is familiar with the location you have chosen will provide her planning expertise and should have local contacts offering wedding-related services, to recommend.

Some destination venues offer “throw in’s” as an incentive. There are those, for example, who will include the ceremony at no charge, with the stipulation that the couple book rooms for a minimum number of nights and a certain number of guests. Freebies can be disappointing, so make sure you know all the details, in advance.

If you are getting married either out-of-state or out-of-the-country, do a little homework to avoid difficulties. Different states and certainly different countries have their own marriage license, waiting period and other regulations. Keep in mind that some places have residency requirements, lots of paperwork to complete, and/or substantial tests. If you want your marriage to be legal and recognized “back home,” you’ll want to be thorough with these details.

Because you are planning a long-distance wedding, you may need to ignore some things. Your special weekend wedding should, if all goes well, serve as a pleasant vacation for you, too. You can improve your odds of having a good time if you try not to get caught up in little details that keep you from enjoying your weekend. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Do only those things that you think are very important and then free yourself up to relax, have fun and join your guests in enjoying the festivities.

Pay special attention to the way you pack. Ask your dressmaker or bridal shop owner how best to pack your gown for travel. Make certain you have the correctly-sized suitcase(s) or box(es) ahead of time. If you are traveling by plane, take any items that you’ll be wearing on your wedding day with you into the cabin. Lost luggage is devastatingly painful where a wedding is concerned. There even are airlines that offer a special compartment for hanging long garments, like a wedding gown. Call the airline in advance to avoid the hassle at the airport.

Traditionally, invitations should be mailed four to six weeks before the event, but that may not be enough time for your guests to buy plane tickets and make travel arrangements. If the place you have chosen has limited lodging accommodations, some of your guests may need to be “housed” elsewhere, so the sooner they know your wedding date, the better. Get in touch with your guests early, with a “Save the Date” letter, an informal form letter that includes all the information they will need. Include information about the venue, sites to see locally, transportation hubs (closest airport, closest bus depot, etc.). Information about the climate can also be very helpful for guests planning their trip. If you have started to set up accommodations, include that information too, along with any other travel information. Sending the letter out as early as three to four months ahead will give your guests ample time to take advantage of any special air fares and make whatever other arrangements they need.

It is your obligation to obtain or prepare a really accurate set of directions to the location. The way to write these instructions well is for you to drive the route and record the details. It is helpful to include not only street names, numbers of traffic lights and turns, but also “landmarks” along the way to forewarn drivers of upcoming turns. If you can, include a map.

Do your plans well in advance of your arrival at the venue. Leave a few hours or a day at your destination, before your wedding, for de-stressing, relaxing, unpacking and unwinding. Try to get as many details as possible finished up while you are still at home.

Particularly with this kind of “all-inclusive” wedding, it is especially important to include all the details into a contract, which you should review carefully before you and the management sign.

Your Destination-Weekend Wedding is a wonderful treat for your guests, so resist the urge to over-plan activities for them. Watch out for too many get-togethers, which will eliminate free time that your family and friends would enjoy. Make yourself aware of any special needs of your guests and make whatever accommodations you can for them. If, for example, your wedding will be held outdoors and there’s lots of walking to do, telling guests to wear low heels or flat shoes will show you care. If you have elderly guests attending, you may wish to find out if some kind of transportation, like a golf cart, can be made available to them.

The Challenges
Couples who have an out-of-the-area Destination-Weekend Wedding are faced with a unique problem. When you have such a wedding, you are, in all likelihood, going to leave people off your guest list. There are several other ways to include them. One option is to hold a reception “locally,” at some time after the wedding. Make the function as elaborate or as informal as you wish, anything from a traditional wedding reception to something more informal, like a party. This option gives you the opportunity to invite family and friends who couldn’t make your faraway wedding. It is a lovely touch, if you can, to have your wedding photos, even just the proofs and video to share with those guests.

A Destination-Weekend Wedding can be great fun, but it also presents some special challenges. If you keep your eye on details, give yourself lots of time for planning, keep feelings and sensitivity in the equation, and remember to have a good time, your Destination-Weekend Wedding can be an event that makes wonderful memories for you and yours guests alike.

Questions to Ask
There are some things to look for and some questions to ask before your book a Weekend Wedding location.

1. Is there a great place for the ceremony, so that you can hold your ceremony and reception at a single venue and eliminate the need for you and your guests needed go from one place to another?

2. Can the site accommodate the number of people you assume will attend?

3. Can you, the bridal party, and perhaps some guests stay on the site, or at least close by?

4. Will you feel comfortable with the somewhat informal morning before atmosphere that results from “everyone” being in the same place?

5. Is the bridal suite easily accessible from the reception area?

6. Are there sufficient time and opportunity to get any on-site decorating completed?

7. Is there a friendly and knowledgeable owner/manager/consultant on hand to provide last minute assistance, counseling, coordination or simply words of encouragement?

8. Is the time frame flexible enough to cover any unexpected delays like a member of the bridal party being delayed?

9. Is there enough parking for everyone, including the band and other wedding services providers?

10. Are there reasonable backup plans in case of bad weather?

If you decide on a Destination Weekend Wedding, being prepared is the most stress-free way to plan and the key to making your wedding run more smoothly.

Brides may be surprised to find that, compared to the average wedding today, a weekend wedding may actually be more economical. It is an alternative that is becoming more popular, as couples try to stretch a five-hour event into an extended celebration that will have them, their families and friends sharing joy-filled activities throughout a weekend.